About Christianity

what was your ambition when you were a kid? not during the age when every kid's ambition is to be like his/her father/mother. during the time when you knew what you were doing. was it a doctor? artist? or maybe you wanted to write the best story, or even maybe become the world richest person.

hmm... actually this post... should it even be here? i don't think it is about christianity. yet i don't want to put it at the random blog. it is still from my reflections though.

what are you doing now? maybe you are an office worker. maybe you are doing something you didn't like. when we grow up, i realize that gradually, we are unable to hold on to that dream we once had. maybe for some, it is because our thinking changed. for most of us, i guess it is because our circumstances don't allow it.

do you actually know why i name my website as no-more-fairytales? the reason is very simple. it can be taken literally. when we were young we believed in fairytales. that if we work hard enough, our wishes will come true. that if we are good people, we will live a good life. there were heroes, and the witches always get defeated. as i grew up, i realized that fairytales are there only for one reason: to give hope to the little children, even if it is a false hope. children must have hope. depression and giving up, these are the only things allowed to adults.

somewhere along our lives, most of us gave up our dreams. and because we have to let go of them and take up other things, we slowly forget our dreams. maybe, you slog through life everyday, doing what you don't like. i know people who are complaining about their jobs and how much they wanted to quit. i know people who screamed wih frustration because the things they study are not what they like.

then maybe you get lost. because you have no more goal. i rephrase... because most of us have no more goals that we are after from the bottom of our hearts. our dreams have turned from childhood ambition to short-lived task goals to meet our needs. maybe you gave up being an artist to take up accounting, so that you can have a brighter future. maybe, you forgot about your wish to become a musician, so that you can become an engineer and have a stable job.

you know, when we do this, we usually suffer a little bit. i know this kind of feeling very well. because i am like that too. i never liked the sciences and mathematics. i had always liked the arts. but for the sake of future i gave up all of them. instead of geography i took up chemistry. instead of linguistics i took up mathematics.

slowly you will begin to feel trapped. what exactly are you doing? you know the logical answer. you need to do it for your future, for your family (because your kids are depending on you)... etc. but, maybe that is not what you really want. you are doing something you need to do instead of something you want to do?

finally you drag your feet at life everyday. you become totally lost. maybe it happens for just a little while. or maybe a few months? if it gets serious, this happens for a few years.

what can you do? i don't really know the sure formula to it. but i think, if you can, then remember your childhood dream. or maybe, remember what you had really wanted to do. if there were no restrictions, and you could do what you wanted, what would you want to do?

maybe it is impossible in real life to achieve your goals. but at least, you can do something about it. you have things you need to do, and you do them. this is respectable. but doing things you need to do doesn't mean you cannot do the things you like to do.

in your own little free time, you can try doing the things you like. in your 1 hour of rest time you can write a story, or you can draw. in your 2 hours of break, you can read medical books if you like it, or pretend you are a lawyer. hmm pretend? yea, that is a good idea too.

all humans need motivation. do a little something you like here and there, and you can also provide yourself with a little motivation.

you have no time? i think for most of the people, the excuse of having no time is simply crap. i have seen how people manage their time. i know people who work hold a full-time job, study for a degree at night (and did well for it), come up with time to spend with their girl/boyfriends, go out with their other friends and have enough time for rest. we are humans with 24 hours a day. it depends how you manage it. i know this is true, because, i am one of them. and i know it can be done.

remember your dream again. don't forget it anymore. maybe, this will be the single thing that will help you to move further along the road of life.