About Christianity

'there are things that are beautiful because you can never possess them.'

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that was what the king of the world said, when up till the end after everything he had tried, through both persuasion and violent methods, he could not get the woman he wanted.

by right, this should not be the case. the things we have, the things we cannot get, they should be beautiful even whether they are in our possesion or not. but because humans have the tendency to not cherish the things we already have, it makes the statement the king made true.

i myself have this kind of experience once. things that are too easily gotten will make us not cherish them. maybe it is because we don't work too hard for it, that's why we don't feel the rewarding experience. or maybe we got sick of it. be it things or humans, be it money or relationship. it happens to all. it is just that, for some, the consequences of finding it out too late is not that big, for some, we have drastic changes in our lives. whatever it is, we realized it too late, and cherished too late what we should have treasured long ago.

i made myself promise, to no one, but to myself, that i would cherish the things i have. the friends i have, the life i have now...etc. i live in a not so bad world, and even though sometimes it sucks, it actually still turns out to be not so bad in the end.

things that we cannot get, they will always be beautiful sometimes. yes, this is what i feel. not all things are like that, just some things. say maybe you cannot get into a school you want, well... it doesn't really matter, after some time. say, you cannot be with a person you love, and s/he will always be beautiful in your eyes, somehow. maybe you have that experience, maybe not.

beautiful things... because we cannot have them, that's why they will always be beautiful. the reason is simple. we will always have the same reverence for this one thing we cannot get, our wish to get that one thing will still be there.... as long as we have that attitude, it or that person will always be beautiful. because we will always cherish it. even though we don't have them.

the things you have now, many of them are beautiful, you know? if you look at them carefully, maybe your relationships, your friends, your family, your life, your career, your future.... maybe they are really beautiful. just that you don't know them. like i always say, i am talking about a normal life. for the n-th time, even though i have to repeat myself, i do not live in a tragic world, so i won't say anything about it, because i guess i don't have any right to do so. saying something and pretending to understand would be insulting those who live in that world.

everything you have is given to you by God. and it fits your life. of course, i cannot explain why there is famine, war, destruction, abuse....etc. i am not God, and i have no answer. so, maybe, if you are one living in such a world, the rest of this post may be meaningless or even hypocritical to you.

among all the business of study and work, of handling relationships and life problems, have you found out the beautiful things God has given you? have you taken the time to appreciate them? i cannot say i appreciate them fully. i mean, i am a human too, like you. i get caught up by stuffs, i get swayed by whatever i was feeling at that time. but i try to appreciate.

sometimes i detest my boss. and then i worry for my exams in school. i fret about finances. i got angry with my friends. but they too, are beautiful in a way, right? if i detest my boss, at least i have a job when there are many others who are desperately looking for any decent job. if i worry for my exams, at least i can go to school and get an education. if i fret about finance, at least i don't have to starve to death and live in the open like those in the warring countries. if i got angry with my friends, at least, i have friends.

they are beautiful things. things you can get. things you already have. and also, there are things that will never be in your hands. they too, are beautiful. the things around you, the things God gives you, the things He created, they are beautiful.

so, while you can, cherish them. appreciate them. for the things you cannot get, at least, you once saw that goal and ran towards it. at least, you once burned with passion and reached out for it. at least, you know this beautiful thing/human in your life. at least, this beautiful memory will always be with you. it is regrettable that we cannot have everything. but, isn't that part and parcel of this beautiful life given to us?

to hide the mask we are wearing, we put on another mask. how true it is. this is not my own idea, i found it as the lyrics to one of the songs in my playlist. i like the phrase, and think it is true, and so i also put it as my msn nick.

we wear masks everyday. why? haix i have the habit of asking questions and answering them on my own. in any case, we all know it is because we don't want others to know our real-self, our weakness and our ugliness. everyone of us has a side we don't want people to know, a weakness we don't want others to know.

we wear a mask and we go out. maybe to this person we show this mask, and to another we show another mask. maybe we are really feeling inferior on the inside, but on the appearance we put on the mask of 'superiority'. we act as if we don't feel inferior, so that we can cover up our true-self. maybe we do not intend to lie, but we sub-consiously, do that, without us knowing. and maybe to keep the sense of superiority intact, we act as if the things that affect us greatly do not even concern us. that will be the second mask. no, this is not all that is, the above example is only one out of many. me? i admit i do that too.

i have many masks too. not that i want it, it just happened. to some people i showed my cruel side, to some i showed my gentle side, to some i show my happy side, and to some i show my selfish side. maybe we change our masks according to who we deal with. maybe it is instinct we have to do that. i don't know. is it wrong? i have no idea. maybe it is just a different side of us, but it is still us. just like the blind men feeling for the elephant, some say it is big, some say it is small. but be it the head or the tail, it still is the elephant. so for us, can i say that be it this mask or that mask, it is still us? i don't know.

whether i am sad or not, i try to show my happy face to people. because i know letting them know my problems doesn't help, and it is not considerate to spoil people's mood for my own problems. i guess many of you are like this, in front of people you put on a smiling face. i don't know if it is real or not, but to me it is natural. maybe i do that too many times, maybe i am born like that. again, i have no idea. in front of people, i have no problem smiling, no need to even act, it is as if i am really happy and carefree. but again, when i am alone, many times i feel moody again. is it emo? no idea. but whatever the case, it do happen. what can we do? the only answer i can come up with is to pray to God.

but whatever the case, as christians we ought to show the genuine side of us which really cares for those around us, in order to touch the lives of others. if you put on a mask which is not you, then you can't do it, because fake feelings don't get across. love is blind, but that only applies to romantic love. maybe we have our ugly side, but it doesn't mean we cannot show our good side to others. the good side is still the real us. of course we are supposed to get rid of the ugly side, to confess our sins and repent from it. but still, everyone has weakness. can we say that because we have an ugly side, that's why we cannot be true to people? not really. we still can. so if you can, show the good and true side of yours to as many as possible. who knows? you might touch their lives, and in turn they may touch yours too.