About Christianity

i havent been mixing with people of my age for a long time until recently. when i say that, i mean being in an environment where nearly all the people are around my age. for the past few years, i have been mixing with people much older than me, or much more mature than me. hahax i am a little humbled by my own childishness though...

different people in different age groups have different problems. but one problem nearly all of us have, is problems in romantic relationships. the difference is that, people of different maturity levels handle it differently.

i saw people who are desperate to get a partner, and i know people (which i am sure you do too) who get depressed over a relationship problem. sometimes it is a one-sided love, sometimes one like a person who doesn't know him/her. sometimes it is a case of betrayal.

one thing remains the same, which is the fact that nearly all humans desire to fall in love. some of the people were born with the looks, some with the brains. in short, there are people who were born with qualities that attract the opposite sex. for some, they had neither talent nor looks, nor anything else that attracts those from the opposite sex.

oh before i forget, the people i am referring to are all straight. meaning, i am not saying anything about homosexuals.

i think, for this post, i will be talking about people who desires to get a partner but didn't manage to get one.

so, what happens when a person falls into a one-sided love? i think it sucks a lot. what happens when a single person sees couples on the streets. he or she will envy them, i guess. i see many people listing out the benefits of being single, but it is very obvious that they are, or maybe you are one of them, masking their envy and desire with such reasons. because i think, those who really didn't care about being in a relationship will not come out with '10 reasons why being single is good'. i made sense right? i think i do.

of course, being a human means falling in love is a natural process. as long as you are human, i can say with 99.99% probability (self-proclaimed statistics) that you will fall in love. i see many stupid things that people do.

at the end of the day, some of us, or maybe i should say, nearly all of us placed too much emphasis and importance on our romantic life that we forgot what is important. of course, romance is a big part of our life. it can be a big motivating factor to push us forwards. but, it is not everything.

i think, sometimes when it is time to let go, you have to let go. because no matter what you do, the other person will never like you.

personally, i believe that God knows us well enough, and that if it is in His plans, which i think it is, He will provide you a partner most suited for you. sometimes maybe i think, i prefer girl/boy A rather than B whom God had sent me. i think, this is a common problem too. but i also know, that if God thinks s/he is perfect for you, then it has to be it.

sometimes, maybe we can don't focus too much on relationship. there are many other things we can do too. of course it sucks if you want to be attached but do not have someone. but let me ask you, by fretting, what can you accomplish? holding on stubbornly to a 'relationship' that will never have any results will only be a pain. when it is time to let go, you have to let go.

i don't know why i am saying all these. maybe it is because i am too tired to think of what to write. or maybe i am just making up a new post so that my blog's cover story will change. maybe this post is irrelevant at all. i am too busy to blog recently though. or should i say, i cannot manage my time well?

to all singles out there wanting a partner, good luck and trust in God to provide you with a suitable mate...

'geez...what a guy! he ran straight in.'

'i've seen countless martial artists, however, though there are a lot of people who learn quicker than others, there aren't a lot that can reach the top.'

'those sort of people, are different from the people who even though don't have any talent, will rush straight for the top... is that what you mean?'

'the first step to the next level, i think, is to courageously step into the unknown.'

---

the moral of the story for the above conversation is fairly obvious right? and maybe you can guess what i want to say in this post.

without courage, we dare not try new things. and if we do not try new things, how do we learn about them? we will be stagnant and unable to improve. the same with our relationship with God.

in all personal relationships, trust is a very important and neccessary element. without trust, no personal relationship can survive. the same for our relationship with God.

God has our lives planned out, if we were to follow according to His plan of course it would be the best. but of course, He has given us the choice to follow His plan or not. afterall, christianity is also about making free choices. however, free choices doesn't mean you will definately make a good choice.

God wants us to follow His plan, but He always don't tell us ahead what is going to happen. maybe we can see just a little of our life ahead. for me, sometimes it get so serious i cannot even see one week ahead. that kind of feeling, well to put it bluntly, sucks. one thing that kept me going was that God knew what He was doing and whatever turned out will be the best for me. that is the basic level of trust needed. that you trust God to know what He is doing and that He wants the best for you.

that is why as you walk along the path of life that sometimes seems like a never-ending dark tunnel, you need to trust God enough to hold His hand and let Him lead you. sometimes the road He leads us seemed funny and ridiculous. but that is the best route. life is like a big web of road. you can choose to go many different paths. you can walk the path of the doctor, if you really really studied hard. you can walk the path of the criminal. every human has the potential to walk a certain path. for some it is easier, for some it is harder to walk a particular path, say the path of the extremely rich.

like i said above, what we want may not neccessary be a good choice. maybe i want to be a rich person, so i work hard and set up my own business. however God may not want me to do that. He know that by being an artist i can be happier and at the same time fulfil the purpose He had for me. however, an artist may live a poor life. that may seemed ridiculous, considering that our society is money-driven, and if we go according to God's plan, we may be asking for a little trouble.

the path of a rich person has this bright and straight road. the path of the artist may have this dark road. if i become an artist, how am i going to survive? how am i going to support my family? usually when we meet into some trouble we ask for help and trust that God will work everything out. but sometimes, we know that by obeying God we have invited some trouble into our lives. and this time, the question is, are we going to trust God?

the first step to the next level is to courageously step into the unknown. the path in front of you is dark. you cannot see a thing, and God wants you to go there. you are scared. but you also need to know God won't send you to die. He is not a sadistic God. if He planned a path for you, He will plan a way out too. this, is not according to the theories i heard people say. this, is according to my 21 years of life experience. although it may not seem much to you, i think if it works for me, it works for you. because God loves everyone.

the path may be hard, but there will be a reason why God wants you to walk that path you are scared of, the path that will make you suffer a bit. maybe as you walk along the path, you will find something new. maybe you will get something much more in return compared to that bright path you saw at the crossroads of life. and if you survive that path, your relationship with God will be taken up to another level. in short, level up (just like game-speak). you would have experienced God's love and grace more. you would have seen the results and the process and trust God more.

bravely step into the unknown, and aim for the next level. even though the unknown may be tough, but the rewards are well worth it. God, the most powerful being in all creation, is with you. the road may be hard to walk, but there is no need to be scared of anything else.

i am going to say something very simple today. but i think everyone of us have heard the moral of the story, so i guess it might be pretty boring. hmm, let me see. maybe i should change the story and come up with the same moral of the story? hahax.

everyone of us meet different people at different times. schools, work, social meetings, chance meetings, co-incidence, miracles, saviors, whatever. many people come and many people go. some stay with us longer and some not. some give us good memories and some not. familiar? yea, i guess i am repeating what the others before me had said so far.

i had good friends, and still do. you know, the thing with good friends is that when you are with them, whether man or woman, you think we will always be good friends. because the current friendship is so sweet, so stable. but after a while, as in many years, and experiences, i came to realized that good friends can be split into 2 categories - permanent good friends and temporary good friends. regarding the permanent good friends, i guess there is no need to say anything more.

temporary good friends. i had temporary good friends, both male and female. there were things you would talk to a boy and not to a girl, and things you would talk to a girl and not to a boy. the thing about temporary good friends is that after some time, the relationship falls apart, or got distant. no, there need not neccessary be conflict or strife. it just happens as surely as ice melts and as the sun sets. maybe the setting sun would be a good example. it happens. when you look at it and observe it by the seconds you would not notice the difference. the sun looked as if it is not setting. it looked as if it would always be there. turn your back, go into the toilet and come out in say, 2 minutes? the sky darkened. it is fast. same as temporary friends, before you know it, they are gone.

maybe not gone. maybe not a total breakdown. but surely, the relationship is not as close as before. is there anything you can do? sometimes. sometimes not. i tried to save it sometimes, sometimes i don't. so far, none of them worked. if it did, it would not be called a temporary friendship. the old saying goes, it takes 2 hands to clap. builidng a relationship is like buiding bridges. you build, and the other side at least need to connect it to his/her side, even if he/she does not want to build it.

a relationship, i take it as building and connecting bridges. building bridges can be done by either 2 or 1 person. certainly it is harder for one person to build. but the fact is it can be done. the thing that cannot be done is the connecting part. you may build the best bridge, but ultimately the act of connecting to the other side, the heart of the person, lies with the person's decision. you may persuade, talk, scold, cry, whatever. you can influence, but not make the decision. if the other side do not even bother to connect it, there is nothing you can do, as far as my limited experiences tell me. sometimes you try too hard, and people think you are irritating. that is when you know you have to give up. at least it is for me.

why am i writing this? because i have lost another temporary good friend. so maybe when i am writing a blog i thought of this. of course, this is not to say that if your friendship is going to be temporary, you will not give your best. you never know if that good relationship will turn permanent or not. even if it does not, a relationship should require that both parties give their best. of course, i am saying this as a close relationship between 2 parties, not just aquaintances. sometimes we touch people's lives, sometimes they touch our lives. if we can make a positive impact on others, even if it is temporary, does it really matter? maybe, God put you there temporary to make an impact on that person's life. and when your job is done, you will need to go to another person. maybe that is the whole plan. of course, it is a pity to see a good relationship gone like that. it just break down. suddenly, you might not feel close at all. but, maybe out there, there is another person waiting for you.

if you want a good friend, the moral of the story i want to say is, Jesus is your permanent Friend. actually, does my moral of the story fit the story itself?

today, out of a sudden, i felt down. i felt moody. maybe you would call that emo. but luckily i did not give anyone trouble. i have a habit of hiding it when i feel down. furthermore, i was alone today. well i was outside, with a lot of people, but nobody i know is with me. so i did not talk. i just felt down. maybe you have times like that. today is just one of the days. i don't like it.

reason why i felt down? some stupid reason. relationship again. no, i am not attached to anyone. i liked the wrong people, and the wrong people liked me. haix. end up single. not that i mind. i know myself that i am not ready yet. i know that i will screw it up if i enter a relationship now. i think i am still tired of it for now. yet, when i look at people, when i think about my friends, this feeling of envy came up again. i think i wrote about it in one of my previous posts. yeapx, i know i am not ready, yet i envy people. so contradicting. people always thought i am popular with the opposite sex. i have no idea how popular i am, and i don't really care.

is there a moral of the story today? i don't know. i remember asking God for help when i felt moody just now. why do i have to be moody? i thought i already got used to it. i don't want the wrong person to like me, and i don't want to like the wrong person. it is too tiring. i think i am good now, for now. well, i still got no reply why i felt moody. i still remained moody for sometime. then something else distracted me, for a few hours.

ok, since i made this post, it must serve a purpose. i made it a point that every post i made must serve a purpose, if not it will not appear on this blog. my conclusion: feeling moody must have something to do with your hormones or whatever chemical reactions in your body. the mind knows the situation, the heart just refuse to accept it. next time you feel moody for a stupid reason like mine, find something else to distract you with it. it is hard, but we have to know what is best for us and not let the heart take over too much, particularly if your mind tells you what is your real situation.

Today is Valentine's Day, a day where romance is celebrated. There is no other days in the 365 or 366 days of calender that you would find girls carrying flowers or presents around as they walk, or guys smiling happily with the little presents their girlfriends made or buy for them. You can see the smiles on people's faces everywhere. The guy who finally got enough courage to confess and got accepted, the girl whose crush finally confessed to them, or even the confirmation from their partners that they still love them. To the people who are having a precious relationship with their partners, my heartfelt congratulations to you. There is perhaps no emotions more powerful enough to make a person feel more alive and meaningful, except for hate.

But what about the others? As we see the smiling faces of everyone who are enjoying the sweetness of romance, what about those who didn't get to experience it, and still have to watch others who are enjoying their relationships? We didn't see people sulking around the streets, but that doesn't mean they are happy in their hearts. The boy who finally got enough courage to confess but was rejected, the guy who didn't even get the chance to get near the woman he likes, the girl who didn't receive a confession from the boy she admires and the woman who step out of her 'boundary' and confessed but still was turn down. Finally we have those who 'got used' to the freedom of being single, but still thought, 'I wish I could be like that couple over there.' and the ones whose partners told them they wanted a breakup. Humans are not made to be alone, that's why we feel for the opposite sex (or the same sex).

No, I am not going to give you advice on how to get your crush to fall in love with you, or how to improve your relationship. The rest of the article, or whatever you call it, is a reflection i got today.

As the singles walk around and see couples, we may thought, why is it only me out of my other friends, remains single? Or why did that uncool person over there got attached? Am I not even comparable to him/her? Perhaps you will be familiar with the thought of 'I love this person so much that if it is possible, I want to get married with him/her and start a family, living happily.' I guess everyone would have thought of that before. 'I did so much, and it all come to waste.' Almost certainly I would say you would have cried over a failed relationship, or over a relationship you can never get it to start, whether is in front of your best friend, or whether it is in your room in the middle of the night. Either case, it hurts.

I can offer no sound human wisdom to alleviate your pain. But as you probably would have guessed, i can only offer you consolation, or maybe some encouragement using Christianity teachings. If you stumble into my blog, you would have noticed I am a christian who don't put my life stories on blogs. So same for here, I will not put my life story here (which is why nobody ever visit my blogs). But before you go away, thinking: this is another idiot trying to preach, let me assure you I am not going to do that. But I am going to explain somethings in the christian manner, so non-christians please do not get offended by it. Don't worry I will not insult anybody in my article. Lols.

As we all know, God is all powerful and all knowing. Even before you are born he already knew you, planned your life and has everything set for you, if only you would follow Him. I know it sucks to know that you are not in control of your life, but let's not go into that for now. Now, if we can agree with what I said, that it logically follows that He has already chosen a partner for you, if you are planned to get married. I can't say for sure whether you are planned to remain single or married. Nobody knows. But let us assume everyone here is planned to get married. So if we are still not having a partner, and we are planned to get married, then what on earth is going on? I thought about this, and the answer popped up. Simply because the time is not up. Either you are not ready, or your partner is not. But one thing we know, if you are planned to get into a relationship, start a family, you will get it. That is provided you follow Him. Of course, we can take control of our own lives. I choose my own partner! Sure, but then, are you sure you will be happy with the one not meant for you? When things go wrong, maybe you would start to think: What would have happened if I had entered into a relationship with another person instead of him/her? Without a confirmation from God about the person meant for you, you would sway a little from your relationship when things go sour. You would not think of keeping the relationship at all cost. When that happens, doesn't the heartbreak from a failed relationship more painful than the one you get when you could not get a relationship to start? Only when we get confirmation from God that the man/woman is meant for me will we have no doubts, and will repair the relationship and not give up easily. Because if God says that feller is my partner chosen by Him, then the person i'm seeing everyday really is for me. there will be no thoughts about: if i had chosen someone else. After saying so much, what is the moral of the story?

Everyone wants to love and to be loved. But we sometimes don't see that coming. Wait patiently. Communicate with God. Find out from Him what he wants from you, and above all have faith. If it is meant for you, you will get it. God doesn't make mistakes, but we do. Who doesn't want a relationship like Romeo and Juliet, where one could not live without the other? Or who wouldn't be touched when they see the japanese drama [Sekai no Chuushin de, Ai wo Sakebu], where the guy's love for the girl is so deep that he could not let go of the relationship with her, even after she died of leukemia 17 years ago? Is 17 years, not 17 days, not 17 months. We can have that kind of relationship too, I mean the depth of love, not the act of suicide when you saw your partner die. All I can say is, wait faithfully and trustingly from God. As for me, I am waiting too. =)