About Christianity

'i regretted my actions. but if time turns back and i have to make a decision once more, i will still make the same choice.'

there are people like that. or maybe should i assume, that all of us are like that at one point or another? the above statement, if i am not wrong, should bring back such memories you have.

maybe you would have heard someone say, 'oh, i am so going to regret this.' but in the end, they still did what they did. maybe you too. and me too. knowing the consequences of our actions, yet we do this so called 'forbidden' action. sometimes it is for ourselves, sometimes it is for others, and sometimes, it is for no one, just that we cannot help it.

maybe i should give you a few examples, if really my assumption is wrong and my readers, if there are any, did not do things that they know they will regret.

say a family member pays off the debt of a gambler instead of sending him/her for rehab, knowing full well that s/he will gamble again. or maybe a student giving up studying to play, knowing she will suffer in the exams. a man fighting with another because his anger got the better of him, not caring about consequences. a guy falling in love with another woman who does not like him, yet at the same time could not refrain from giving her up, resulting in depression. a woman dreaming about living together with another man happily ever after, knowing full well he is attached.

the above examples range from slightly uncommon to more common. of course they are by no means exhaustive. maybe you would have known people like that, or you yourself are like that? are we then stupid? i thought, maybe yes. sometimes i even had he cheek to tell God, 'God, please let me be stupid, just for a while more.'

sometimes we don't know which decision is wise and which is not, yet at the same time we know the choices we are about to make are foolish. we don't want to ask for wisdom, and maybe sometimes you are like me, telling God to let us be stupid. i remembered someone once said that everyone is entitled to be stupid once in a while, just don't abuse that privilege. is it true? i guess in the end it depends on the weight of the problem and its consequences.

we were told to be wise. so then, is our acts of deliberate stupidity wrong? seriously, i have no idea. maybe i did too many stupid things to know. but if i have to say, i would say it still depends on what kind of situation it is. although it may sound very fake, since i myself don't do it, but i guess if i have a piece of advice you might listen, i should just give it. not that i am very wise, nor am i a saint, and neither am i your parents. but as usual, i say my piece, and you decide if i am right. because i am a human too, and i make mistakes. if life is as simple as 1+1=2, i might have bet my life on my advice. stupid decision again, right?

so, well i am supposed to say, if we know we are going to do stupid things, and know we are going to regret it, why not ask God for wisdom? afterall, who can be more wise than Him?

for all the words i typed and you read, is that all i wanted to say? i guess, well yea. is it a stupid decision to decide to read this post? i don't know.

i don't know how many more stupid things i am going to do, nor how many more times i am going to ask God to let me be stupid just for a little while more. but i hope, that if the time comes for me to face the consequences, i can do it. because i don't know how am i going to pray and ask for help when in the first place i wanted to do stupid things.

anyway, i had a look at my previous blog posts, and i really find stupid stuffs inside. in a way, i am even embarrassed to know that i did actually write such stupid and lame stuffs. i wanted to delete it, but i thought, maybe i should keep it. because they represent the level of maturity and thinking i had a few months ago. well, letting people read about my immaturity, it seemed stupid. but i guess, it is a stupidity which consequences i can take it. not that within these few months i have gained more wisdom. just that maybe that time i was just feeling a bit more childish than usual. well, being childish is my entitlement...

i hope, that you will not regret too much for all the stupid things you did.