About Christianity

zero (the name of a character) will never be able to return to being a human, and for the past 4 years he has fought against his vampire instincts. that would take more willpower than i could ever comprehend.

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well i guess those of you who read manga or watch anime will once again know which story this came from. for the benefit of those who didn't know, i think i better give a little background of the story. the guy was a person who hated vampires to the core because his whole family was killed by one of them. he had survived the attack, yet was turned into a vampire because he was bitten, turned into the very existence he hated to the core.

oh well so that's all i needed to explain to get this post up.

willpower. something many of us, or maybe all of us have. the only difference between us is that for some of us it is stronger, some of us it is weaker. we always see this kind of thing in anime and manga. stories.

say kurosaki ichigo trying hard and risking his life to get his bankai (highest level of sword mastery in the story). allen walker trying desperately to get his innocence (a kind of weapon) back. uchiha itachi doing all he could to be alive up to the point he secured his brother's safety and power. (i am trying to use the most popular of characters so that more people actually know what i am talking about.) and lastly, from above we have one vampire going against his instincts.

i thought the vampire example is most suited for us.

all of us, are born into a world of sin, whether we like it or not. all of us, no matter what we do, can never go back to a pure and innoncent person again, just like how zero can never go back to be a human. there are some of us who love to sin, because it brings pleasure. just like how a vampire sucks the blood of a human (i always wondered who set the rule that vampires cannot suck animal blood. oh well..).

sin, as we all know, is destructive. depending on the kind of sin, we can not only harm ourselves, but the people around us, and maybe the people not related to us. he had hated vampires because they had destroyed his family and his life, and in the same way sin has given us troubles too right? relationships are broken, lives are messed up sometimes...etc. yet, the funny thing is most of us don't actually hate it. in fact, most of us embrace it.

as commented by another person, that guy had gone against his vampire instincts for a long time. and that he also admitted that doing that took more willpower than he could ever comprehend. that is obvious right? going against your instinct, against what you need (the blood, not the sin), all alone.

in a way, we are also fighting against the temptations of sin. well, actually many of us don't even bother to fight back right? and even if we fight, we give up easily. because the temptation is too great.

of course, fighting against sin takes willpower. because it is in our instinct to sin. because it is pleasurable to us. because it is in our nature. that's why we need willpower to do that. but, unlike that guy, we are not alone. maybe, in terms of human companions and friends, we really are alone. maybe no other humans bothered about us, whether we live or die, enjoy or suffer. but God is with us. so we are not alone.

the guy's willpower was much more than what others could comprehend. what about us? you see, in stories, characters always exhibit extraordinary willpower. extraordinary restraint. extraordinary determination. compared to them, sometimes i don't know if we should feel ashamed.

we (or maybe only i) are not so determined not to sin. even when we know it is wrong, we don't really care sometimes. thinking, 'God will forgive me.' so, after a little of ceremonial 'resistance', we give up and do what we want. compared to the characters, or maybe even if we think it ourselves, our willpower is just so weak. so weak it is laughable. not that we have to exhibit extraordinary willpower. but that we don't even try properly.

if we really try, and cannot do it, we can always ask God for help. He is always there. unlike zero, we are not alone. erm....he has a friend too, but it was until later that she could help him. knowing what is wrong, even if it means going against his instincts, he tried hard to defend against it. being someone he hated, he went against those of his own kind.

are we like that? knowing what is wrong, even if it means going against our instincts, have we tried to defend against sin? being a sinner, being someone who should hate sin, have we gone against sin itself? in a way, we are really like the character right? yet when we compare, the actions we have taken are so far apart.

i have a feeling i am just repeating myself. blame the time again, not me. i want to sleep. hahax.

so, if the next time temptation comes, try a bit harder to resist it. try it as best as you could. and when you could not do it, ask for help. because it is wrong to sin. because we have someone to help us. it is hard. everyone knows that. but at least, try your best to resist it.

and for me too, i will try too. defending against sin is not something you could do with willpower alone. you need help from God. well, for that guy, he fell in the end though, because his willpower was not enough to keep in check his instincts all the way. as for what happened to him... go read that story on your own.