Diary Again

roughly 4.5 years after i stopped writing a diary, i guess, i will start writing again. i used to write it by pen. i remembered taking stacks of 50 plain a4 size printing papers and go to the shop to have them binded. then i will write whatever i wanted to write, bit by bit, everyday, in that empty pages of the books.

over time, i had gathered quite a few books, all of them sitting nicely in my cupboard. although i don't really take them out to read, partly because i am lazy, partly because there is no point, and partly because i think i will be too embarrassed at my own immaturity, i guess, it is good to have a written record of what is happening to my life.

to those who know me, i guess they know my memory is super bad, and i tend to forget things easily. the same goes to my life, i usually only remember significant events. but significant events, sometimes, they lose their importances and standing over time. and then, memory gradually fails.

memories, good or bad, they make up part of your experiences, and turn them into the you now, be it for good or for bad. of course, to most of us, no matter how much we change, we don't have a very drastic change like what they show in hollywood movies.

well, this time, i am still deciding on how to write. to write in paper, or to write in microsoft word? if i write using the computer software, undoubtedly it would be in english, because it is easier. if i write down on paper, i think, i will write in chinese. because, i like chinese more than english. and chinese would have expressed my thoughts better. don't you think so? there is another bonus reason which came with this decision. people over here are so used to english that they got turned off by seeing long pages of words in chinese. although i will keep it a secret and protect it religiously, i guess, accidents do happen. i have to think of every single possibility and come up with an appropriate solution. haax.

actually, there were days when i really want to write something down. because of the password protected plugin that i installed, i could write some private posts inside here. but still, i think, this blog was not created for me to go emo or to write my personal life. so i guess, the limit is here.

of course, there will be times when i will definitely need to write password protected posts, but i hope, from today onwards, there will be as little emo posts on this blog as possible.

no matter what, i think, although life is screwed up sometimes, where your every course of action is blocked by obstacles and you start to get real irritated and pissed, i think, life, is still interesting.

i hope, years later when i look through my diary again, i will smile at it and not regret what i have done, what i am doing, and what i am going to do. this is my life, and i will record down as many details as possible. because memory always fails me.